6 Summarizing Question 2 Answer 4
Question 2 was:
Is summarizing only a matter of wording things properly?
Your answer was:
No you need to also check their reactions
Is this correct?
Yes
This is the most correct and complete answer.
You need to stay alert and watch their nonverbal behavior, because as long as you talk that is how you get ongoing second by second reliable feedback. That feedback is instant. You don’t get a reaction nonverbally about something you said two minutes ago.
When you keep monitoring their nonverbal reactions, you will immediately see, when they don’t agree with your words.
When you summarize, it is often a whole story. So when you ask at the end is it correct what I said? Most people will respond with a yes, because they relate your question to the last part you said only.
There is a very real change that there was a part in your summary earlier that they didn’t agree with completely, but since you went on they also went on and dismissed it.
It is crucial to stop where you get a nonverbal no reaction to your words and fix the disagreement before you go on. Otherwise, you convinced yourself you understood them, but have created a boobytrap that you probably will step in later.
So, yes you answered right that you also and simultaneously need to monitor their reactions on your words.
Take an extra minute and read below also the questions and answers that where not completely correct. You´ll to get additional insigh.
You know already what is correct and here you find what is not correct. You´ll get an even clearer understanding of why you choice was right.
Question 2 was:
Is summarizing only a matter of wording things properly?
Your answer was:
Yes, if you word your summary correctly you have done a great job
Is this correct?
No, only partly
No, this is not complete.
You’re right to say that when you have done a great job when you have summarized, because most people don´t summarize and even less use people´s own words when they do.
Yet with all that done, you still run a very important risk when you leave it at that.
So with what answer do you avoid that risk?
Question 2 was:
Why do you need to summarize?
Your answer was:
To be sure you have understood the other person correctl
Is this correct?
Yes, but…
This is correct, but…
Only half the reason at the best.
Yes you do it for your understanding of the other person, but there is more…
Question 2 was:
Is summarizing only a matter of wording things properly?
Your answer was:
No you also need to keep good rapport
Is this correct?
No, only very partially
For sure you need good apport.
However that is a matter of building up at the beginning and a little maintenance from there on.
When you are at the point in a conversation that you do a summary, you will very likely have good rapport, so that is not the most important thing to do at this moment.
There is more to be done for getting great results with summarizing.